Laughing House: the 11th Husband

Laughing House: the 11th Husband: "The 11 th Husband... A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On thei..."

House of Jokes to make you laugh, as Laughter is a good medicine to get healing in the Body and release tension in the mind

the 11th Husband

The 11th Husband...  A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a Virgin".  "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"  "Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.  "Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.  "Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.  "Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had theorder, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.  "Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.  "Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.  "Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it...  "Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.  "Husband # 9 was a Gynacologist; all he did was look at it.  "Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was lick it..... God I miss him.  " But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".  "Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?  "You're with the Labor "GOVERNMENT"    This time I KNOW I'M gonna get screwed."

Laughing House: The Why's of Men

Laughing House: The Why's of Men: "The Why's of Men 1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX? (because they are plugged into a genius) -------------------------------..."

House of Jokes to make you laugh, as Laughter is a good medicine to get healing in the Body and release tension in the mind

Laughing House: Like his mother used to do

Laughing House: Like his mother used to do: "Woman's Poem ©Unknown He didn't like the casserole, And he didn't like my cake: He said my biscuits were too hard, Not like his moth..."

House of Jokes to make you laugh, as Laughter is a good medicine to get healing in the Body and release tension in the mind

The Why's of Men

The Why's of Men

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?
(because they are plugged into a genius)
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2. WHY DON'T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?
(they don't have enough time)
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3. WHY DOES IT TAKE 1 MILLION SPERM TO FERTILIZE ONE EGG?
(they don't stop to ask directions)
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4. WHY DO MEN SNORE WHEN THEY LIE ON THEIR BACKS?
(because their balls fall over their butt-hole and they vapor lock)
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(You're laughing, aren't you?!?!)
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5. WHY WERE MEN GIVEN LARGER BRAINS THAN DOGS?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktails parties)
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6. WHY DID GOD MAKE MEN BEFORE WOMEN?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)
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7. HOW MANY MEN DOES IT TAKE TO PUT A TOILET SEAT DOWN?
(don't know.....it never happened)
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(C'mon guys, we laugh at your blonde jokes!)
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And the personal favorite:
8. WHY DID GOD PUT MEN ON EARTH?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn
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Remember, if you haven't got a smile on your face and laughter in your heart...
Then you are just an old sour fart!
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One for the ladies........
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me,
'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'
'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'
He yelled back, ' University of Oklahoma ..'

And they say blondes are dumb...
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A couple is lying in bed.
The man says,
'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'
The woman replies,
'I'll miss you..'
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'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
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Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man; Love to forgive him; And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death...
AMEN
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Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough
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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder 'Instruction Manual.'
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